I was recently asked to help answer some bridal dilemmas in the September/October issue of An Essex Wedding magazine, I thought they might be useful for some of my blog visitors that are unable to buy the magazine so I have recreated the question below.

Q. I would love our wedding to express our personalities, but I’ve just been so bombarded with ideas from friends and relatives, blogs and magazines that I just don’t know where to start. I feel I need to focus and make it uniquely about us. Can you help?

It can be very easy to follow the crowd, and this is why so many weddings look similar. My advice is to sit with your fiancé and answer the following questions:

• Choose one word to sum up your dream day
• Do you want your wedding to be: fun / glamorous / quirky / classic / rustic  or vintage

Then you can begin to think about the overall tone of your celebrations. Don’t get too caught up in little details yet. Your design could be bold & daring or you could favour a classic look with subtle touches.

Start collating images in a scrapbook or via pinterest of styles you like, using a variety of media sources including wedding magazines and blogs. This enables you to slowly create a moodboard of looks you love. Don’t rush it or try to force a design, and don’t panic if you change your mind, this is perfectly normal. And finally the most stylish weddings are those where the venue type and wedding décor work seamlessly together

I’m so excited to tell you about an event that the UKAWP are running alongside some FABULOUS suppliers. As a director for the UKAWP I am immensely proud of this event and I sincerely hope you can join us there.

The Wedding Sanctuary is a bridal event being held at the stunning Somerset House on the 20^th March. This is not a ‘wedding fair’, it is a ‘wedding show’ designed to offer top design inspiration alongside practical workshops from the UK’s leading experts. Don’t believe me? Let me explain more…..

OUR PARTNERS

We have teamed up with some of the UK’s most inspirational suppliers whose enthusiasm is infectious.

Julia Boggio Photography, Amanda Austin Flowers, Sternberg Clarke ,Gorgeous Film Productions, Staggered, Table Talk , Zoe Clark Cakes , Cutture Stationery,

Some suppliers will be paired with the fabulous wedding planners who make up the UKAWP to offer top tips and the opportunity to ask specific questions regarding every element of your wedding day.

And if you think this is yet another ‘fair’ for grooms to be bored at you’d be wrong  because international bloggers, staggered will be on hand to assist them with their suits, stag dos and speeches.

The Wedding Magazine team will also be there to chat through your ideas.

PRACTICAL ADVICE

The UKAWP will also be offering a range of talks addressing the trickier issues when planning your wedding like how to set and stick to a budget, and how to get the best from your suppliers. You can find me in the ceremony room where I will be overseeing all the presentations. Please do come and say hi!

DESIGN GALORE

We want you to be relaxed so sip champagne and nibble delicious canapés courtesy of renowned event caterers Table Talk whilst browsing the inspiration zone for design ideas. 5 stunning dining tables will be styled by wedding planners of the UKAWP alongside Zoe Clark Cakes and Cutture Stationery, displaying the very best of what is available to hire for your wedding reception, with pricing guidelines and practical information included.

HOW DO I LOOK

Brides in need of style advice can meet in the boudoir where the likes of Sassi Holford and Emmy Shoes can dress you from head to toe whilst hair and make-up expert Elle au Naturel and top personal stylist Katrina Choat offer consultations on how to look and feel your absolute best on the day.

BOOK ME A PLACE

To book your ticket please go to The Wedding Sanctuary website Tickets cost £10 for a single ticket or £15 for 2.

PRIZE DRAW

There is also a prize draw we would love you to enter:

Luxury travel to the show by Mechgem Luxury Wedding Cars
(from addresses within the M25)

Free double entry to either the morning or afternoon session

A private 1 hour consultation with a top wedding planner
during The Wedding Sanctuary

A personal shopping experience with stylist Katrina Choat

Q. We are having 200 guests for a marquee wedding, we did this to keep it more relaxed but I’m now wondering if we will need some formality and order on the day?

I have co-ordinated a lot of marquee weddings and highly advise you either have a co-ordinator or toastmaster or ideally both! A marquee does not have a dedicated person to ensure the whole event is running smoothly, in short there is no-one to take control. To explain the difference a co-ordinator will decorate your venue, manage the suppliers, manage the schedule and make announcements when requested. A toastmaster tends to dress in formal wear and instantly is recognisable by guests as a person of authority. They can arrange your receiving line, announce your guests, introduce the speakers etc.

Q. We have finally chosen our venue for our wedding next summer but I’m really stuck on what colour/theme. It seems whenever conversation comes up regarding the wedding it’s the first thing people say ‘whats your theme then’? Ahhh, I feel like screaming I DON’T KNOW!

For some brides choosing a theme/colour is so easy and something they have been thinking about secretly for years. But for others, it takes a little investigation to find a style that is right for you. First thing first, go back to the venue and look at the walls, floor and general décor – you don’t want to pick a theme of lilac in a red gothic building. Then speak with the venue about what colours looks great in their building. Finally start looking at interior magazines as well as wedding magazines to see what fabrics, colours, accessories and styles you like/dislike. Start cutting the ones you like out and stick to an A3 card. Take this to a DIY shop and collect paint swatches to find out what colours work well together. Hopefully after this process you have a colour and theme to work with!

Q: I hope you don’t find me rude but why the fuss over wedding planners? Just what do you do? It seems an awful waste of money to me, sorry!
Don’t apologise I can understand why you could be confused. Hiring a wedding planner is not for everyone but those that do hire us feel relieved knowing their wedding will be organised to a professional standard. Personally many of my clients no longer live in the area and do not want to burden (or trust) their parents with all the organising. They all work very long hours with little time for wedding research let alone meetings. Some say they have seen friends all consumed with the wedding and do not wish to go the same way. As well as full planning most planners offer on the day co-ordination leaving you to plan the wedding and just handing over to ensure your plans are carried out on the day. For more help view the UK Alliance of Wedding Planner (www.ukawp.com) for further details on what questions to ask a planner.

Q: I’m getting really worried about to choose the best supplier, how do I know if they are experienced and suitable?
Ok a few simple rules that should put you on the right road. Firstly never, ever pay for a consultation with a supplier – if they want to charge walk away, you shouldn’t have to pay for the privilege of them selling to you! Secondly ask for references, can you contact some independently? Ask if they belong to any trade associations as this can help prove their professionalism. Ask to see samples of work, if photographer/videographer ask to see a complete wedding not just a show reel. Also trust your instincts, if something doesn’t feel right walk away. And finally don’t be pushed around, all very well supplier/venues giving opinions but it is YOUR wedding.